How to set auto email to send "Activate Your Account" once customer subscribe our email newsletter

On a related note, when a new user signs up for an account, they are receiving the Customer Account Welcome email immediately along with the Customer Marketing Confirmation email. It is completely bypassing the Customer Account Invite email. How do I get it to send the Invite email only? And how do I prevent that user from being added to marketing (even in a pending state) since they never asked to be opted in?